Case Study: Fitzemeyer & Tocci

Design Storytelling



DPS converted a client-commissioned cost-benefit analysis on power generation with liquefied natural gas (LNG) into a manuscript for journal submission. Reduced original word count by 60%, and bookended original material with a new introduction and actual ROI calculations made at the end of a pilot phase. Article is awaiting publication.


Brevity Counts In Thought Leadership

Three Pictures, and 1,500 Well-Chosen Words



  • Simply explained the project’s approach in 1/3 of original length
  • Manuscript met exacting word count limits for each section
  • Simplified Introduction and Conclusion
  • Recovered multi-year ROI of project
  • Converted 1/4 of passive sentences to active voice to reduce length


Design-product Systems reduced a technical report the project engineer had written to propose a project to a university client. The report proposed a novel, time- and cost-saving plan for adding a liquified natural gas facility to their central plant. DPS turned this into a case study article that covered the project’s conclusion and return on investment. 70% of the original manuscript needed to be removed for it to fit the article lengths that trade publications desired. After an initial editing and restructuring, key sections were collaboratively refined to be both technically accurate and concise. A simplified Introduction, Conclusion, and Results sections were finally added. Passive Sentences, which accounted for 41% of the original, were reduced to 30%. Passive Sentences are longer than equivalent Active Sentences.

From Proposal to Success Story:
Visualization of reducing a client-specific proposal (4,738 words) to manuscript length (1,785 words) project success story.

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Words in original project proposal

Average word count of trade journal manuscript

Hours of writing and revising


Passive-voice sentences changed to active voice